 The
Fine Art of Gift-Giving in Japan
When
invited to a Japanese person's home, never go empty-handed. Take some
cake, alcoholic beverage or perhaps some flowers.
Gift
season
O-chugen
-- summer gift season (July)
O-seibo -- winter gift season (Dec.)
Presents are given to those who have been of assistance. Not only between
individuals but companies as well.
Don't be surprised if a gift arrives from a total stranger or his company.
It is just a matter of formality.
Giving
cash
There
are a few times when it is customary to give money as a gift. One is
at a funeral ceremony. The money must be wrapped in a special envelope
designed for the occasion. Relatives, friends and company of the deceased
may send a large wreath with their name on it. The second is at a wedding
ceremony. The money is put in a special envelope (easy to find at a
shop since it is the most gorgeous). The third is Otoshi dama, it is
a New Year custom that used to be a gift of some coins in a small envelope
given by relatives to children, but now it contains banknotes.
Gift
certificates
These
are available at department stores and can be exchanged for goods of
a certain value. Convenient when the sender can't decide on a suitable
present. If you want to buy a friend a bag, for example, but you are
not sure of her taste, simply send a gift certificate and tell her to
choose herself a bag. Tax is charged when buying these certificates.
Okaeshi
The
returning of gifts is a common custom. A 'thank-you-for-the-gift' gift.
The idea behind this is the sharing of happiness. A similar thing happens
at weddings, when all the guests at the ceremony receive a gift before
they leave.
Excuse
me, EXCUSE ME!
Gentlemen
first! Ladies first is not the rule. When entering a building or getting
in an elevator, the ones who get in first are the winners. Busy businessmen
will push you out of the way, so watch out for bruises.
In Japanese society, especially in business, it used to be that a person
was not usually addressed by their name but instead by their rank or
profession. So you might hear "Mr. Section Chief!" or "Mr.
President!". When the person has no special title they might be
addressed as "Excuse me!" ( "sumimasen"). These
days however, a number of companies are abandoning this tradition and
starting to call people by their last name.
The stationmaster, landlord, greengrocer etc. are usually called by
the names of their professions. So you can call the greengrocer 'yaoya-san'
and he will call you okusan (wife, or Mrs.). Okusan is used as a form
of address by friends of the family, even though they would prefer to
use the real name.
Anything
We Forgot?
Greetings
When
bumping into a Japanese person you have met before, think of the weather,
then say good morning, afternoon or evening, and make a comment about
the heat or cold. Remember the Japanese words for the weather to use as
greetings. Another common from of greeting is 'dochira e' or 'where are
you going?' and the usual answer is 'chotto soko made' or 'just down there'.
Here, the question and answer have no real meaning. Then say 'ja' which
means 'see you' and you have had your first conversation in fluent Japanese.
Additional
Business Tips
Japanese
business is littered with manners, dos and don'ts, styles, customs and
everything else you can think of. So, just to keep from embarrassing yourself
in public, here are some additional pointers on Japanese businessmen.
Firstly, you must have noticed by now that the Japanese do not openly
express their emotions. They don't laugh out loud, and so the logical
assumption would be, it might be best that you didn't either.
Secondly, you might also have noticed that they are usually polite. Are
you in for a surprise! They're all nice and polite inside the office,
but once outside or they happen to be in groups, they're just the same
as all the other obnoxious people, maybe worse. And don't even expect
a greeting from them unless they actually know you. I don't know, must
be all that stress getting to their head.
Thirdly, never expect an opinion! Rarely ever will you get a Japanese
person to willingly express their own opinion. That's how it goes, even
in college classes, you could probably do that commercial that they have
in the US? The one by Sprint where they claim their phone lines are so
good that you could here a pin drop? Well, it will probably be silent
enough to actually test their claim.
Lastly, always remember, the cell phone, not a dog, is man's best friend.
Business
cards
Business cards or Meishi are essential in Japan. These should be exchanged at the start of any introduction. (See also "Business")
Shoes
These
are never worn inside Japanese style homes, restaurants, temples or
inns. Slippers are usually provided. Separate bathroom slippers are
also provided, but these should not be worn outside the bathroom.
Tips
Tips
are not necessary at restaurants or on taxis.
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